hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
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I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
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So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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