He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize