Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
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We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
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I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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