Those balls look pretty dangerous.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize