you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
im holly from the hills drunk
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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