I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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