Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
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