Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
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It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize