It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize