Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Randomize