What did we do last night that was yellow?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize