if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
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Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
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you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
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