you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
how does that bad decision feel?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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