so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
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in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
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My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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