you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
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I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
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I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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