Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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