life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
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