Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  are we going to glenview for practice??

  (847): View more from Illinois

  (3 hrs later) aids

  (248): View more from Michigan

  where r u? what is story? im way too high right now

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  (248): are we going to glenview for practice?? (847): (3 hrs later) aids (248): where r u? what is story? im way too high right now http://tfl.nu/h122
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.

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  (847): Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy. http://tfl.nu/pes5
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it

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  (248): He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it http://tfl.nu/3ch4
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.

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  (563): why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth. http://tfl.nu/0ql9
  Replies (23) Good night (691) Bad night (3773) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.

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  (716): I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were. http://tfl.nu/cyr9
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.

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  (256): You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers. http://tfl.nu/otyu
  Replies (10) Good night (6874) Bad night (1025) Order T-Shirt
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.

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  (618): My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma. http://tfl.nu/chfg
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  (61): View more from Australia

  Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.

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  (61): Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above. http://tfl.nu/o1v2
  Replies (5) Good night (754) Bad night (2153)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.

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  (216): Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket. http://tfl.nu/jk3k
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  (228): View more from Mississippi

  He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"

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  (228): He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good" http://tfl.nu/hwu1
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  (310): View more from California

  Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?

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  (310): Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK? http://tfl.nu/84zy
  Replies (9) Good night (1550) Bad night (533)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY

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  (706): WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY http://tfl.nu/3x6y
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  (817): View more from Texas

  It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.

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  (817): It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life. http://tfl.nu/h7k0
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.

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  (970): You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday. http://tfl.nu/28cn
  Replies (2) Good night (728) Bad night (207) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum

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  (412): Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum http://tfl.nu/plc1
  Replies (0) Good night (398) Bad night (146) Order T-Shirt

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