Texts From Last Night

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  (650): View more from California

  Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.

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  (650): Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low. http://tfl.nu/on4s
  Replies (13) Good night (1109) Bad night (3167) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Buhtt sex?

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  (503): Buhtt sex? http://tfl.nu/zx30
  Replies (9) Good night (2387) Bad night (1074) Order T-Shirt
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  (254): View more from Texas

  I am coming home for anal

  (254): View more from Texas

  * a nap*

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  (254): I am coming home for anal (254): * a nap* http://tfl.nu/ou5x
  Replies (39) Good night (11797) Bad night (1420)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.

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  (918): After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again. http://tfl.nu/cy0p
  Replies (141) Good night (469) Bad night (6062) Order T-Shirt
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  (213): View more from California

  the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.

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  (213): the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad. http://tfl.nu/2doo
  Replies (31) Good night (473) Bad night (5197) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.

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  (773): It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out. http://tfl.nu/p4fr
  Replies (16) Good night (5096) Bad night (639) Order T-Shirt
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.

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  (602): Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter. http://tfl.nu/60s7
  Replies (17) Good night (1054) Bad night (4633) Order T-Shirt
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.

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  (202): Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic. http://tfl.nu/byt1
  Replies (9) Good night (1167) Bad night (3868) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.

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  (201): A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus. http://tfl.nu/oh1b
  Replies (4) Good night (3439) Bad night (1089) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it

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  (717): if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it http://tfl.nu/n58g
  Replies (16) Good night (3394) Bad night (1449) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?

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  (978): and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy? http://tfl.nu/x9f9
  Replies (15) Good night (1490) Bad night (1078) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.

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  (310): I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied. http://tfl.nu/wnhg
  Replies (13) Good night (4404) Bad night (667) Order T-Shirt
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work

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  (705): You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work http://tfl.nu/80dk
  Replies (5) Good night (1933) Bad night (587) Order T-Shirt
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.

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  (808): At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life. http://tfl.nu/lsk4
  Replies (5) Good night (1443) Bad night (429) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?

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  (508): I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself? http://tfl.nu/e252
  Replies (3) Good night (871) Bad night (287) Order T-Shirt

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