It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize