So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize