I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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