On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
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