My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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