He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize