I murdered the dance floor call the cops
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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