I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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