if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize