I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Randomize