I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
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