remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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