No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
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