we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize