He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
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You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
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I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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