this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
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Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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