The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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