i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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