I am puke
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
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