Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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