so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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