I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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