I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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