I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Randomize