I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
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