my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize