loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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