I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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