sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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