I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
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