Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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